If you’re hankering for quince jelly this Thanksgiving (and who isn’t?) run, don’t walk, to the nearest Western Beef.
Western Beef is a grocery store, in case you didn’t know. It’s full of delicacies from around the [Third] world. Look for it on the wrong side of the tracks. No, really.
Here in Nassau County Long Island, Western Beef is literally on the wrong side of the tracks, the Long Island Rail road tracks. And I mean literally literally.
Here (below) are some soft drinks on the shelf: Mango, Cocnut (with bits of coconut flakes suspended in what must bo the gooiest beverage imaginable), and something called “Peru Food”. All from Ecuador.
These are jars of Cactus, some kind of leaf that looks like a by-product of raking the lawn, and vegetarian tentacles.
This (below) is the sign that says, “Ethnic Cookies”. And that’s a cactus in a cowboy hat pointing down the aisle. (I don’t know; does this seem a little, oh, insulting to Ethnics?) This is where me and my camera where spotted by the manager, who asked me to stop taking pictures of the store. In an instant I was all attitude, rolling my eyes and asking him sarcastically “Are you kidding me? You’re worried about my camera??” because I was raised in the ’60s: I always question authority. Also, I’m a very unpleasant person, in general.
So then I asked the manager where he was hiding the quince jelly and he kindly took me straight to a shelf with about four different kinds of quince jelly, and he apologized for not letting me take pictures and I started to feel kind of crummy that I always get so snotty at the drop of a hat like it’s my default setting, and I thanked him kindly. To make up for me being such a douchebag.
And as soon as he was gone I took this picture of the two quince jellies I couldn’t decide between. I liked the label on the left the best, but the brand on the right was more expensive (the on the left was $2.49 and the one on the right was $6.00). When it comes to foreign foodstuff, I equate expensive with less likely to have been cooked by workers who shit in the batter. So I bought the expensive stuff.
And so far, my digestive system tells me that it was worth it.
And I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving, with or without the quince. But with all the good food, good friends, and good talk that comes from gathering around a turkey and copious amounts of wine.
And remember: look here for my stupendous new announcement to be be published on December 1 at 7 AM Eastern Standard Time.
Until then, see you Monday! That’s Monday, November 30, A FIVE DAY WEEKEND FROM NOW.
Hey. Even bloggers blow off Thanksgiving week.