Actually, this is genius:
I got up last Sunday and puttered down to the kitchen to make tea and toast, as I usually do. I turned on the radio. NPR was strangely sentimental, telling story after story about moms and motherhood. Then the host of the morning show says, Happy Mother’s Day, everyone.
Well, crap. I thought Mother’s Day was THIS week, not last. I had some great Mother’s Day content lined up for you.
So, it’s a week late, but here’s your Mother’s Day wishes from me:
My headline (above), The United States of Stupid, can apply almost any week of the year here in the USA, but this week brings us news of Americans going-the-extra-mile to be stupid.
As you might know, the Colonial Pipeline (a private, non-government, capitalist company) was held for ransom by Russian hackers who crippled the firm’s computers. This pipeline is 5,5000 miles long and it pumps 3 million gallons of gas a day and jet fuel from Texas to New York. This hacker attack shut down the pipeline on Saturday, May 8.
Bring on the panic buying.
The first states to get hit by a sudden drought of gas were the southern states. As of 4 pm ET Wednesday, May 12, 68% of all gas stations in North Carolina, 45% in Georgia, 49% in Virginia and 45% in South Carolina were without gasoline, according to Gas Buddy, an app that tracks fuel demand, prices and outages.
“This situation is now being exacerbated by panic buying and hoarding,” Frank Macchiarola, an executive at the American Petroleum Institute, said during a press briefing.
No shit, Sherlock.
Things are normal here on the north shore of Long Island, but in those southern states where gas is becoming scarce, it’s the Hunger Games out there, played by the god damn dumbest people on earth:
This photo (above) was taken in Florida, where the governor had to declare a state of emergency because people were panic-buying gas and hoarding it, causing shortages in south Florida but here’s the thing: Florida does not get its gas from the Colonial Pipeline.
Now that Joe Biden is president, I don’t spend a lot of time wishing for the good old days of 2008 – 2016, but something happened last week that made me miss the Obamas again. I miss their their natural elegance, their thoughtfulness, and their humanity.
Looking back, I realize that the Obamas were too good for us. Here’s your reality check:
In case you can’t read this, this is what is in the press release Trump sent out because he’s still banned from Twitter and Facebook:
The major Michigan Election Fraud case has just filed a bombshell pleading claiming votes were intentionally switched from President Trump to Joe Biden. The number of votes is MASSIVE and determinative. This will prove true in numerous other States. All Republicans must UNIFY and not let this happen. If a thief robs a jewelry store of all its diamonds (the 2020 Presidential Election), the diamonds must be returned. The Fake News media refuses to cover the greatest Election Fraud in the history of our Country. They have lost all credibility, but ultimately, they will have no choice!
And then there’s Arizona:
By subpoena, the state Senate took possession of 2.1 million ballots and nearly 400 election machines and turned them over to be audited by private companies, one of which has a CEO who promoted debunked election fraud theories after the election and was in the Ca[itol on Jan. 6.
One of the things they are looking for in the paper ballots are bamboo fibers, which will be proof that some of the ballots came from China and were part of the plot to rig the election in Joe Biden’s favor.
Meanwhile, in the US House of Representatives, the Republicans took a secret voice vote to throw Wyoming representative Liz Cheney from her leadership job — a secret voice vote so no Republican had to go on the record but, sure, Kevin. . .
Liz Cheney’s crime was speaking the truth about the Big Lie that Trump won the election last November but the Democrats stole it:
So now there are Republicans who want to break away and form a separate party for the 2022 elections, who will work as hard as Liz Cheney will so that Trump never runs for president in 2024 and I just checked: I have enough popcorn to sit back and watch the blood bath.
Let’s not forget that this happened this week:
We’re talking about Georgia Representative Andrew Clyde, who is of course a Republican (and gun shop owner) who was only elected to Congress in NOv. 2020. He made these remarks during a House Oversight Committee investigating the insurrection of Jan 6, 2021.He said:
“There was an undisciplined mob. There were some rioters, and some who committed acts of vandalism. But let me be clear, there was no insurrection and to call it an insurrection in my opinion, is a bold faced lie. Watching the TV footage of those who entered the Capitol, and walk through Statuary Hall showed people in an orderly fashion staying between the stanchions and ropes taking videos and pictures, you know.”
“If you didn’t know that TV footage was a video from January the sixth, you would actually think it was a normal tourist visit.”
Other Republicans backed Clyde:
“It was Trump supporters who lost their lives that day, not Trump supporters who were taking the lives of others,” said Rep. Jody Hice, Republican from Georgia.
Rep. Paul Gosar, R-Ariz., claimed that law enforcement officials were “harassing peaceful patriots.”
In case anyone needs to be reminded of what happened on Jan. 6:
Speaking of those peaceful patriots:
And this just in:
Jesus Christ, will you look at the time — we have to start wrapping this up:
Did you know this about the big McDonald’s strike?
McDonald’s workers in 15 US cities plan to strike for higher wages on May 19, the day before the company’s annual shareholders meeting.
Employees will go on strike to demand all McDonald’s workers make at least $15 per hour. So far, the strikes are planned for Los Angeles, Oakland, Sacramento, Miami, Tampa, Orlando, Chicago, Detroit, Flint, Kansas City, St Louis, Raleigh-Durham, Charleston, Houston, and Milwaukee.
A McDonald’s spokesperson said: “It’s the responsibility of federal and local government to set minimum wage, and we’re open to dialogue so that any changes meet the needs of thousands of hardworking restaurant employees and the 2,000 McDonald’s independent owner/operators who run small businesses.”
In other words, “The government has tied our hands because they set the minimum wage.”
Hey, McDonald’s: Just because there’s an unreasonable low minimum wage on the books in every state doesn’t mean that you have to pay your workers minimum wage. It’s not like the government is forcing you to only pay minimum wage.
And while we’re at it:
Re: COVID. This was interesting — I wondered why the second shot of vaccine is so much worse than the first.
And about COVID. . .
This reminds me that I’ve been saving some non-Covid Words of Wisdom from the internet for you all, and now seems like a good time to share it:
That’s enough self-improvement for now. Let’s look at cute animals and some wise-ass memes:
More working cats:
That’s it for this week, Dear Readers. There’s some exciting things happening here in Casa Too Many Cats on the north shore of Long Island that I will tell you all about next week, so, stay tuned and meet me here next Friday.
Have a great weekend, everyone. I hope all your walks are on the beach at midnight, all your cocktails are ice cold just the way you like, and that all your gasoline is not in a plastic bag.